How do you re-learn how to trust after infidelity? You must be feeling betrayed and very hurt by your partners cheating. Your partner has come clean and confessed to cheating and you have both decided to re-build your relationship. This is certainly a good start but where do you go from here? Do you just forgive and forget?
Once trust is shattered, it can be an uphill task to rebuild it despite your best intentions. You need to be aware of the most common myths on how to trust after infidelity. This will prevent you from falling into the same trap that others have got into and ending up disillusioned and heartbroken when things don't work out.
JACKIE
How to trust after infidelity - Myth#1
You must make sense of the affair to help you trust again
Don't try to make sense out of nonsense. Trying to rationalize your cheating spouse's behaviour or sympathizing with him/her is quite pointless. Don't bother blaming yourself either. It's not your fault. The bottom line is, it never okay to have an affair to solve problems that exist in your marital relationship.
How to trust after infidelity - Myth#2
Trust you spouse if he/she is sorry and has promised not to cheat again
Remember the old adage "actions speak louder than words." It's not enough for your spouse to say sorry and promise not to cheat again. They must cut contact with 'the other person' completely. This is the only ay to heal your relationship and start trusting again. You can't work on dealing with the consequences of the affair while you're still having it.
How to trust after infidelity - Myth#3
Time will help me trust again
Is time a great healer? My thinking is that time heals nothing. It is what you do with that time that matters. Don't let time pass by and hope that the pain and hurt will go away. Start working on your relationship. Small steps like taking time to talk to your spouse everyday will go a long way in helping you rebuild trust and rekindle your marriage.
Trusting your spouse after infidelity should not be rushed. The pain is so excruciating that you may be tempted to go trough it quickly. Your cheating spouse often wants to "move on" because s/he fears talking about the affair and getting embarrassed. Again, don't rush. You must first address the foundational issues of trust, respect and acceptance to help you build a stronger marriage.
How to Trust After Infidelity - The Most Common Myths Exposed! JACKIE
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